queen of the robots
 


Saturday, November 15

These are all the recaps on TwoP's main page. Just cuz I'm bored.

Enterprise:Quantum and Qrew play in Disneyland's Frontierland, where, while standing in line, they discover a settlement of humans who have lived there for over two hundred and fifty years. Digging a little deeper in the dust, the Qrew learns that these humans were abducted from Earth by a race known as the Skags before the Wright brothers even found flight. Originally enslaved by their abductors, the humans turned the tables on the Skags until every line regarding their treatment of their former masters rings of pre-Civil War slavery. Hoshi and May-Gone-in-Sixty-Seconds stay aboard and miss all the fun of seeing Trip trade in his harmonica and Reed shoot T'Pol. Didn't he say he needed to spend more time in the armory?!

Smallville:Last week we flashed back to 1961. This time, we go back two years to Season One with a Krypto-Freak-'o-the-Week who has a crush on Lana. This kid gets a snow globe to the skull at a town carnival (only instead of snow, the globe has meteor rocks flying around in it). One MRI later, the kid's got magnetic powers. Mag-Neato! But not only can he bend the simple will of metal to his doing, he can also influence people's attraction to him. Because he's got magnetism. Get it? Get it? Ah ha ha ha ha ha (kill me now). Of all the people in the world he could influence, though, he chooses Lana, turning her into a needy bad girl who disregards Clark's feelings to start dating her new metallurgist friend. Clark, of course, is all bent out of shape, and he's not even metal. Much agonizing about Clark being jealous despite making it clear he doesn't want to date Lana. How I hate this clumsy dance of delusion. Long story short, the magnetic kid goes on a power trip and goes bad; Clark electrocutes the crap out of him; and Lana ends up with a mop in her hand doing community service for stealing money from The Talon. (You can tell because her blue jumpsuit says "COMMUNITY SERVICE" on the back.) Even seeing Lana mopping no longer gives me a thrill. Meanwhile, Lex finds out that Chloe's been investigating his family and gets her to spill her guts about her findings. If this means more Chloe and Lex scenes, I'm down with that. Boy, the episodes hit a rut early this season.

Angel: (Wait, Strega put this in blog form? She's my new best friend...)

robots

Sorry I haven't updated much, but my arm still hurts: it got punctured by a grappling hook because these robots burst in while I was helping W. meet a subcontractor -- who was a real pig by the way, and then W. was a pig too! Acting like he's supposed to protect me like I'm still scared little Fred who needs to be rescued from the monsters. With all these lawyers around they're begging for a sexual-harassment suit, not that I'd do that, but it's tempting to think about it, and anyway I finally got fed up and snapped at him. I felt bad because his dad was visiting and I guess they don't get along so good. He seemed nice, the dad I mean, W. is still a pig even though I guess he's okay sometimes but right now I'm really mad at him and this is my place for venting so gosh darn it I'm gonna vent!

Later on there were more robots attacking, which is pretty typical. While everyone's fighting I ran into W.'s dad, and then somehow we all wound up on the rooftop. And W.'s dad was actually working with the robots, and he wanted to do something magic to A. to make him do whatever they wanted. Whoever "they" are. I don't know why people don't just ask. It's like they say in Pylea: you catch more nimdoks with frizzlewortz than with vlook. Anyway, W. and his dad are pointing guns at each other, and I'm awfully confused, and then all of a sudden W.'s dad is ready to shoot me, and then W. shot him instead! It wasn't really him. W.'s dad, that is. It was really everybody else. I think. I should check into that, I've been hearing some rumors from K. So W. shot his dad kind of a lot, and then we found out it wasn't his dad because it was another robot made to look like his dad, but W. felt pretty bad about it anyway and I guess you can imagine why. I was trying to perk him up a little and he was even weirder than he'd been before. I don't get him.

I almost forgot the good stuff though: K took me home. He's been really sweet because of my getting hurt, and I think he's so funny but he could possibly be evil and I'm not really into the whole "bad boy" thing but then again everyone else gets to date morally bankrupt people so why shouldn't I?

current mood: confused
current music: Dixie Chicks, "Don't Waste Your Heart"

Karen Sisco: Karen wants to catch a fugitive that she already lost once when he decked her in a sauna. It seems that this fugitive, Louis, stole money from his boss (an extortionist), and then killed the boss's assistant (and lover) when the assistant caught him. So Louis has been on the run for a while, and Karen really wants to be the one to bring him in. But Louis's ex-boss also wants to bring Louis in, and has dispatched his goons to get to Louis before Karen does. First, she tries Louis's wife, who gives Karen the address of Louis's girlfriend, Carrie. Except the girlfriend turns out to be a boyfriend, Carey. And then Carey is killed by the goons for no good reason, which was kind of sad. So Karen decides to fake Carey's funeral, hoping that Louis will show up. Louis does show up, except he's not Louis anymore. He's Lois, and he's married to Stan the dentist, who has no idea of Louis/Lois's past. The goons are also at the cemetery, and in the ensuing shootout, Louis/Lois escapes once again. Karen finally catches up to Louis/Lois at home and brings her in. Meanwhile, Marshall is hired by a wife to catch her cheating husband, but it turns out that the wife is actually the girlfriend. Marshall, of course, figures the whole thing out.

The O.C.Adam Brody looks adorable rendered speechless by Ryan's sexploits, wearing primary colors; rambling to someone who may or may not be Rosie; saying, "You what now?"; being "built like a pipe cleaner"; expressing outrage over limerick censorship; and asking if he's "that guy." In this week's episode, the question of Ryan's sexual experience is finally settled. Very, very settled. Not only have there been many girls, but there have been many times with the same girls, much to Seth's amazement. The weekly swank quotient is satisfied by a benefit on a yacht, thrown by the newly nice Lady Heather, who is only being nice to pretend to her family that she wants them all back together, while seeing Caleb in secret. Why the pretense? No one knows. Ryan plays matchmaker, sending Seth and Anna off to the benefit together, where Summer is jealous of Anna, probably because her dress isn't falling off. Anna near-kisses Seth, and a resistant yet smitten Summer really kisses Seth, and then has a breakdown over it. Meanwhile, Ryan is on to Lady Heather and Caleb and tells Marissa at the benefit, where she outs them to the crowd. So Marissa and Lady Heather have nothing left to say to each other, and Caleb and Kirsten have nothing left to say to each other, and by the end of this episode, no one has anything to say to each other. Nevertheless, there's lots of nookie, although not at Wolfram and Hart South, where Rachel comes on to Sandy in the unsexiest moment ever televised. It involves crawling, and suffice it to say she's no Bette Midler in the video for "Beast of Burden." (Best song ever, by the way.) Also this week, Jimmy gets some great lines, Kirsten wears uncharacteristically bad makeup; Marissa wears characteristically ugly, elfin shoes; Caitlyn's back but without China; and the lemons and limes are back together! (yay!)

Jake 2.0: This week, Jake is feeling a little infallible. Strong. And a smidge full of himself and his nano-powers. He deliberately disobeys an order from The Man to bring down a crazed government employee who is holding his co-workers hostage (Jake busts through the wall, Kool-Aid style, to bring him down. Ohhhh yeah!!). So, with all his brand new full-of-himself attitude, Leader of the Pack sends him on a new, scary assignment: to infiltrate an elite but raggedy corps of the Army, the WolfPak, and find out who's been placing nuclear decoys where weapons should be. Jake gets branded (a cute little wolf scar on his forearm), goes to a big-titty strip bar, has a martini mixed in his mouth, and generally loves the WolfPak life. Until he has to hide his cover and shoot The Man in the chest. It's all very hoo-ah and butch and scary, until Jake's army brand magically heals over beers with The Man as he recovers in his hospital bed. Yup, people that get shot in the chest at close range looove to have a beer as they convalesce. I learned this on Melrose Place!

There's actually more, but what the hell, who cares?

L@T3R ^|^V(H


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